In the last post on Bocas del Toro, I mentioned that we got robbed by some real life Pirates of the Caribbean. Let me explain further.
On our second to last night we went to place called the Aqua Lounge with a group of 10 friends, that turned into about 20, by the end of the night. We had arranged with a guy on the island to take us to the Aqua Lounge (it sits right on/over the water) and back for $5 per person.
When we got to the Aqua Lounge a bunch of our group only paid $2.50, expecting to pay the other half when we got back. Everyone was pretty drunk as we were arriving, so before the guide could collect all the money most of the people were gone off the boat ordering drinks.
Clay and I picked up the tab and thought everything was cool. Everything seemed tranquillo as we saw our big, Rastafarian captain freaking dancing some white girls.
Side Note:
I met a couple of Swedish girls (gotta love my heritage) and convinced them I was going to vote for McCain. They weren’t too happy about it.
It’s a funny thing with women. You can say the most horrible shit (and in this case voting for McCain is a horrible thing) and they will stick around. As long as there’s a smile on your face, you can do or say no wrong.
Anyway, I played it off for as long as possible, with them threatening to leave me 6 or 7 times. I finally told them I was mistaking the ‘black one’ for McCain and all was better.
Now, back to the pirates:
It’s time to leave. Everyone stumbles to the boat. Our captain turns to me, looks me in my eyes, and says everyone hasn’t paid yet. I try to tell him that I gave him money already for everyone. He’s not having it. I try to tell him that I have no reason to fuck him. He’s not having that either.
Finally, after a lot of discussion, he says fuck it, gets in the boat starts the motor and away we go. We’re about half way home, in the middle of the ocean and he cuts the engine. At the time everyone’s drunk so they laugh. I’m smart, so I cuss.
He tells us all that we have to pay $15 more before we go anywhere. All the drunks keep having a good time while I debate with him. I remember using the phrase, “I have no reason to fuck you,” at least 10 times.
After ten minutes even the drunks are getting ansy. Finally Clay pulls out the last of our money and hands it to the guy, as well as some of our other friends pulling out their money too.
The pirate is now happy, and we’re allowed to go home.
The pirates in Pirates of the Caribbean were a lot more charming.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
It sounds like you are having adventures. The first and last parts were thrilling.
Take care!
P.S. Are you coming home for the holidays?
Funny as hell. Honestly i can just see you dragging the McCain thing out for hours. Brilliant. As for the ass pirate, did you ever stop to think that: A) this rasta dude probably cant swim and you should throw his ass overboard B) there are 20 of you C) you could have just gave him one of the drunk white girls you were with and called it even.
Too beautiful.