Live Uncomfortably

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I don’t know a lot about soccer, but I do know this: goals come in bunches. Once somebody has scored, the goals seem to pour in. This simple phenomenon reinforces the valuable lesson of social proof.

In one study by the famous social physcologist Bandura, he showed children fearful of dogs, a 20 minute clip for consecutive days of other children playing with a dog. After only four days, 67% of the children were willing to climb into a playpen with a dog and remain there while everyone else left the room.

A few nights ago I went out with my 2 roommates. We picked a restaurant that was relatively empty because we wanted a quieter dinner. But, slowly, the place started to fill in, and before we knew it, there was a line to sit down.

The Two Prongs of Social Proof

1) If other people are attracted to something you’re going to be attracted to it also. Bestsellers sell ten times more copies than none bestsellers. We laugh more when there are laugh tracks during television shows. The bars with lines outside are more appealing.

2) When we see that someone else can do something, we believe we can do it too. The soccer goals start pouring in because the players suddenly realize that it’s possible. The defense isn’t perfect. The goalies are beatable.

Search out people that have done something you want to do. Those people will provide the proof to you that it’s possible. If anybody tells you can’t do something slap them right in the face or balls if they have them. Then show them others doing the same thing.

Their answer will almost inevitably be something along the lines of “Well you’re not him,” or “You’re not genetically gifted.” They might be right. But, I guarantee every player on the soccer team isn’t a genetic freak. I’ll bet each team has someone who simply worked harder than the others and believed it was possible. He saw others doing it and knew it was possible.

The people who go beyond what’s already been acheived most likely have seen it elsewhere too: in their minds.