Colombian Women – A Must Read

by Derek Johanson

in Uncategorized

Colombian women are a strange, strange animal. I’ve been here for 2 months now, and I’m still discovering new things about the women. They’re freaking crazy / beautiful and I love it.

A friend ruining an otherwise beautiful pic

I’m the guy on the right

Let’s break down what makes a woman, a Colombian woman.

What Is Beautiful Is Beautiful (Que es bonita es bonita)

They have a saying in Medellin, “Que es bonita es bonita.” It pretty much sums up the people here. I lived in Los Angeles for 3 years, but I’ve seen more beautiful women here in 2 months. Seriously.

The only problem is, when you’re gorgeous you know it. So, they’re also very vein. I have a mirror in the living room of my apartment. Whenever there are women in the apartment, they literally stare at themselves in the mirror. One night we had a little dance party, and they were fighting over who could watch themselves dance in the mirror.

The bodies (hay dios)

Ok, what takes the women here from average to gorgeous is their bodies. They all have the perfect shape. Slim, with wide baby-making hips. And, to top it off they move their bodies like you wouldn’t believe. It’s an extremely musical culture so they’re always dancing. Hay Dios!

Berry, Berry Nice

The hotter the woman, the more bitchy, right? Wrong. The women are extremely approachable and easy to talk to. Their ”nice-ness’ has actually been a problem because I’m a sarcastic bastard. You can hurt their feelings pretty easily, especially if your Spanish sucks and the joke doesn’t translate that well.

Derek’s Theory: It’s difficult to be bitchy when you know there are a crap-ton of hotter girls out there. Hot girls in the states can have attitude because they’re comparatively better looking. That’s the not the case here. Everyone is at least partially good looking. The average women here are 8′s in the states.

Promiscuous but Not

Here’s the tricky part and what makes Colombian women so difficult to figure out. Colombians are very promiscuous but not all. Keep reading…

It is not uncommon for a man to have 3-4 girlfriends in Colombia. I’ve been asked several times how many other girlfriends I have. It’s not a big deal to be a player. And, it works the same way for the women.

I’ve literally gotten phone numbers of girls with their boyfriend standing right there. And, there’s absolutely no jealousy what-so-ever.

BUT, at the same time, it’s every woman’s dream here to get married and have children. Something like 98% of the country is Catholic.

In a nutshell – they don’t really want you to be with other women, but if you are, it’s not a big deal.

The bottom line for guys: if she has a boyfriend, don’t worry about it, stay the course. However, don’t expect a ton of one night stands. You’re going to need to put in your time before the big pay-off.

Disclaimer: It doesn’t hurt that I’m an American. According to a lot of women here, big white guys (BTW I’m huge in Medellin) are exotic. Can you believe that? When’s the last time someone told an American he was exotic?

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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Rico December 19, 2008 at 10:00 pm

Wow Der I Loved Reading How Your Girls…

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Rico December 19, 2008 at 10:01 pm

omg that was kelly she is illiterate. I have no idea what she ment.

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Jon April 14, 2009 at 3:00 pm

This post is so basic but you brought the facts. Thanks alot..now I want to go back

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Vivian January 16, 2010 at 1:24 pm

Hello I am a Colombian woman and I can honestly say that is not all true.I guess maybe “women” are more open minded in my country but, the saying of having 1-4 girlfriends and boyfriends is NOT a fact.(if they do the women don’t know about it) and lets not forget that our male companions are not always our boyfriends could be cousins,guys that have been knowing the family since a young age, or simply friends.Colombian women are not easy and you may ask my AMERICAN husband about that! We have been told we are exotic and beautiful inside and out and once we find a partner you best believe is for a lifetime ride !

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jc March 17, 2011 at 11:06 am

You’re a moron that’s going to get used for a green card.

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frederick July 2, 2011 at 8:45 pm

This is one of the most misleading posts I have read in awhile. I have been living in Medellin for the last 3 months and have made the following observations:

The vast majority of colombian women have never played a sport or attended a gym. This leads to larger amounts of “soft tissue” than you would expect. I workout religiously (possibly to compensate for being agnostic) and their bodies leave much to be desired as far as I am concerned. Additional concerns you should have are their unreliability, ignorance, and general unresponsiveness to gringos after waves have been invading for years.

There are only two types of people that really believe medellin has better looking women than major american cities; the 50/50 crowd (50+ years old and 50+ lbs. overweight), and the drug/sex deprived losers who cannot get any from their native land. Happily I do not fall into either category. I have been to over 50 cities outside the U.S. and this is in the bottom third easily. And I am conversational in spanish so that is not the problem.

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Matt December 11, 2011 at 7:34 pm

Frederike if you think its shit why have you spent 3 months there, the women there are beautiful inside and out stop looking for ” soft tissue” and go do another bicep curl

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Tony D December 13, 2011 at 11:47 pm

Hey thanks for this. I’m working on dating a Columbian woman at the moment. She’s….HOT.

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John March 24, 2012 at 6:27 am

I’ve lived with a Colombian woman for the past 4 years (here in Australia!) and have gotten to know a lot of people through her – I can only make a few comments:

-Have met very few who are promiscuous, but most are very friendly and affectionate. On the whole I’d say Colombian women are immensely loyal and if you fool about on them you’re in a hell of a lot of trouble.

-Looks, yes average Colombian woman I’ve met would be about an 8 or better here too, but they are wonderfully friendly and approachable. Huge, wonderful difference from most women here.

-Yes, they do know how to move wonderful bodies. Which make me very happy!

-On average they are bat-shit farking crazy. Massively emotive and with very short tempers, but so long as you’re relaxed about things it’s over as quickly as it blows up and everyone is happy again. Probably the weirdest women I’ve ever met, but also by far the most fun.

In conclusion, I’ve said it to many people since I’ve been with my gf – Colombian women have their problems but they are hands down some of the most fun, funny and wonderful women I have spent time with – quite simply I don’t ever want to go back to dating an Australian woman, who by comparison would be unappealing, unpleasant and most of all self involved. Bravo Comombianas!

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Steven May 3, 2012 at 1:41 am

I Live in Canada
I am 71 years (Shoot……….Am I too old????????)
RETIRED (Not Tired)
Am still CRANKING
Can I find a Colombian GIRL / Woman ??
No offence, but I gyrate towards women of ages between 35 to 50

Aye

Get back to me if you would

Merci

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