Live Uncomfortably

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My week long experiment as laid out in Talk To Strangers: They Might Have Candy has come to an end. I tried my best to say “hello” to everyone I passed on the street or elsewhere. The results were outstanding. In one short week I feel like I changed a life long aversion to talking to people I don’t know. And it didn’t even take the whole week. It took one day! Overnight I transformed myself into a more social person.

Last week one reader, Michael, posted a comment that I think is worthy of its own post. It sums up my experiences and feelings rather elegantly.

I’ve been trying your exercise in saying “hello” whenever possible and i just thought I would share some interesting observations and revelations I had. First off, its crazy how fast you start to feel the effects of “just going for it”. I became increasingly more confident (or maybe it was indifference to a possible negative response) with every person I spoke to. After a few days of trial and error you learn how to approach people without seeming awkward or “weird”. All of this culminates into a life skill of being able to connect with someone without needing an introduction or a connecting circumstance. EVERYONE is now a potential friend, business partner, lover etc. It opens up an infinite amount of doors, and in my opinion, is the most effective way to break down your previous limiting mindset.

That being said, I want to point out some disturbing observations. Most people I talked to were reluctant to have a conversation…at first. I would say “hello” or comment on the magazine they were reading, and they would be very short with their answers. Through repetition, you can feel out which people will eventually be receptive and which ones are just so uncomfortable by your presence, that they actually fake a cell phone call or something.

It’s too bad that society has deemed that talking to strangers as dangerous and taboo. Having experienced this social enlightenment, I can truly say the world would be a better place if people weren’t so closed off.

The act of saying a greeting to everyone is empowering. Even if you don’t necessarily think of yourself as an outgoing person, when you do things that a confident person does (like say hello to strangers), you automatically become an outgoing person. People instantly perceive you as a confident person with high self-esteem and self-worth. And that in turn boosts your confidence. It has an exponential effect on your social life.

So go try it! Say “hey” to everyone you pass and see if you don’t instantly feel like a more sociable person. If anything, it’s hilarious to see people’s reaction. Half the time people mutter inaudible responses because they are caught off guard.

Post some responses and feedback you get below.